Burger King

The next time I am ordering a whopper at burger k I am going to act like I am going to act like I am about to crack up the whole time. They will probably spit in my whopper but that's okay. Maybe that's selfish.
People call Evlis "The King"! What if Elvis were actually a king? I think it woould be funny and I think it would look like this:
"Hey baby bring me my scepter" said Elvis, king of Zimbabwe.
"Yes, my liege. Right away." said his court jester.
"Why are you still talking and not bringing me my fucking scepter grrrr" replied Evlis who was pissed off. His court jsester made haste and hustled off backwards still facing the king to get the scepter which was in the castle kitchen.
"AH yes life is goood as the king. I want a deep-fried peanut butter and banana sandwich......baby." Just then elvis started going a little crazy.
"Damn Elvis why are you talking to yourself? Stop it haha." said Elvis to himself. "I think I'm going a little crazy."
"We're all a little crazy, Elvis," said a ghost that lived in the castle. "Boo!"
"Jesus Christ you scared the shit out of me. Call first next time!"
"Lol elvis you know I don't know I don't have a phone!" laughed the ghost.
"Haha then get one!" cracked up Elvis
"Fuck you!" said the ghost.
"Fuck that I don't let anybody talk to me that way! Not my employess, not my boss...who is Jesus. Nobody. Off with his head." Just then a bunch of King's court guards appeared and hauled the ghost away. It was hard because he kept turning intangible but there were a bunch of them and eventually they took him to the guillotine and chopped his head ass off. I bet you thought ghosts couldn't die but now they can.