The Isle of Lesbos

Hey goose

Hey goose

Hey hueys

This one is called "There's a Hole in My Butkus" and it contains stong messages about the current state of the Democratic Party.

Burger King

The next time I am ordering a whopper at burger k I am going to act like I am going to act like I am about to crack up the whole time. They will probably spit in my whopper but that's okay. Maybe that's selfish.
People call Evlis "The King"! What if Elvis were actually a king? I think it woould be funny and I think it would look like this:
"Hey baby bring me my scepter" said Elvis, king of Zimbabwe.
"Yes, my liege. Right away." said his court jester.
"Why are you still talking and not bringing me my fucking scepter grrrr" replied Evlis who was pissed off. His court jsester made haste and hustled off backwards still facing the king to get the scepter which was in the castle kitchen.
"AH yes life is goood as the king. I want a deep-fried peanut butter and banana sandwich......baby." Just then elvis started going a little crazy.
"Damn Elvis why are you talking to yourself? Stop it haha." said Elvis to himself. "I think I'm going a little crazy."
"We're all a little crazy, Elvis," said a ghost that lived in the castle. "Boo!"
"Jesus Christ you scared the shit out of me. Call first next time!"
"Lol elvis you know I don't know I don't have a phone!" laughed the ghost.
"Haha then get one!" cracked up Elvis
"Fuck you!" said the ghost.
"Fuck that I don't let anybody talk to me that way! Not my employess, not my boss...who is Jesus. Nobody. Off with his head." Just then a bunch of King's court guards appeared and hauled the ghost away. It was hard because he kept turning intangible but there were a bunch of them and eventually they took him to the guillotine and chopped his head ass off. I bet you thought ghosts couldn't die but now they can.

It's a midwest swing........ya'll

Hey hey this one is called "Scarface"

Whaaaaaaat

This one is called "Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise Suck My Dick"

Assorted musings

50 Cent is really powerful. His defense is easily 400+ while a normal person's is about 120. And don't even get me started on his face.
When did it become acceptable to listen to Black Eyed Peas? I would like to know the exact moment so that I could travel back right before it happened and say "Nooooo!" in a really slowed down voice.
What kind of woman works at a sperm bank? A slutty kind of woman! Oh yeah. It's kind of like how if a chick works in a casino, you'd expect her to gamble, ya know?

Attention everyone in the first 3 rows: you will get wet

This one is called "Balls"

I'm so emo that my blood runs grey

Fat women make me sick. Lose some weight, fatties. Mosly why I do not like fat women is because they act all out of place in any situation. If you say anything out of the ordinairy or sassy or unbelieveable around them, they cannot handle and spit out some crazy bitch response like "oooookayyyy" or "ewww gross!" or "omg you have to be kidding me!" or whatever. Well guess what, fatso? I am kidding you so relax! It's like fat women weren't born, they just appeared out of nowhere, asking, "Where am I, who am I, and why am I so fat?" Jesus Christ.
If you are looking for something funny to do while you and a friend are searching through a house for a lost object, look in places that are way too small to contain that object. Funny examples of this might include looking for a 4-year old child inside of a backpack or for an inflated beachball inside of a toilet.

Breaking news: we have a new pope

White smoke in the Vatican can only mean one thing: we have our 265th pope.
Pope Benedict XVI, also known as the elusive Joseph Ratzinger, was born April 16, 1927 in Marktl, Germany. While some would say that there's not much to know about a new pope before he becomes pope, others argue that this is actually the key to understanding who they were before they reached this higest position in the Catholic Church. This is especially true for the former Cdl. Ratzinger who spent most of his younger days figuratively walking the many roads of Germany, searching for truth and justice. His family was actually forced out of a town for their anti-Nazi beliefs if you can believe that! Despite his inital encounters with anti-Nazism, Ratzinger joined the Hitler Youth in his adolescent years, guarding a munitions factory or an anti-aircraft gun factory or something along those lines...but today he's changed his Nazi affiliated ways, that's for sure. Pope Benedict XVI now hates the Nazis with all guts and will in no way tolerate their presence in the clergy.
Many people are already taking bets on how long it will be before Pope Benedict will come visit us in "the states". I am going to guess 3 months maybe 6 months tops. If you think these sound like really good guesses, you may be surprised to find out that I really don't have any basis for guessing correctly and I'm just going off the top of my head.
If you are wondering what kind of changes Benedict XVI will be making in church doctorine and such, well, nobody knows yet we'll just have to wait and see! What we do know is that it would be pretty funny if he made something happen like Buddy Jesus in the movie Dogma that would be pretty great! I seriously doubt anything like this could ever actually in happen in real life, but you know what they say: real life imitates art.
One thing people may not know about Pope Benedict XVI is that the is an avid advocate of excercise and physical health. He starts every day with a one-hour workout, and when he's not tending to his many religious duties he enjoys going for lively walks through the streets of Berlin or Rome or wherever he might find himself. This Pope's message to all catholics is, "Use the power of God to get in shape! Pray for a long life of loving God, but also do something for yourself and go for a bike ride."
Some might be worried about whether or not Pope Benedict XVI can hope to fill the shoes left behind by the late John Paul II. Worry not, Dr. Ratzinger is alive with energy and faith in the Lord. Oh yeah did I mention he's also a doctor? As you can see he's the only man for the job, and I hope he's in everybody's thoughts and prayers tonight at dinner!

stfu

what's the big deal with brian mcknight
michale jackson crazy friends
Don't fuck up an apology with an excuse. Use Diet 7-Up instead of water to keep cut flowers pretty and fresh for longer periods of time.
oh don't mind hm that that's just the dr phil talking
You and me can give each other blowjobs
Like gay hobos with no jobs
half baked + office space = high fidelity
beat me off while drunk hey has anybody heard this black rob song "Whoa"?
hHeyyyyyoooooo whats up yall this YA hboy kanye to the what's crackcin chi town what goin on where da white women at ahhahhaa!
I love you more than a bouncer loves kicking people out of the club
I'm gonna do it
i'm gonna get hooked on coke
I want to go to the Police Academy. I want to actually go out and make a couple of arrests and I want to go undercover.
Scot whiplash sushi hominid reign blabbing January stoppage retiree LutheranCarthage autocratic banister apartbypassstalactite psychopomp steep hogging plenitude peter withdrawn arthropod bloodstain Vanderpoel hemming purloin Merck dockyard tremor waterhole Franciscan tome abrogate dishwasher inculpable suffuse stripping newsboy flux Sweeney enrollee drupe slipping indignity Shasta limpid Nathaniel bluebird neophyte soapstone prototypic Aviv addition howdy sublimate Fermat clownish bolometer Fayette Peggy vaudeville
i need a cigarette wooo
but i do agree that guy sounds like a big jerk

A taste of genius

Squirt squirt thirst

You now what women want? Mel Gibson? A big fat dick and a black guy to go along with it...unh.
The thing smuckers (the real name is "Pucker" but our apple sour detectives have detected a smarty man in the midst) is called Puckers because it gets women drunk and they kiss you and love you and eventually suck your dick which, I think, is the ideal of any happy relationship, social, romantic, or otherwise. Anyway, Smuckers is a sweet apple booze drama configuration to the maxtreme i.e. blowjob that I don't want any part in e.g. booze for the massas. When, oh, when, did we sign up for all these credit cards we find in our e-mialboxes everyday? I ask ye not for my own benefit, but for the benefit of others. ffffff

Attention all sexy ladies: give me a blowjob

Hey I'm back with a new pic and I couldn't be more angry! GHAAAARRR!! This one is called "The Pope's Penis"

Big guy

Holy See, Holy Do

I watch a lot of CBS. Compiled here are reviews of the majority of the shows on the CBS line-up, rated on a scale of 1 to 999. How is this possible? I don't know, just check it out:

Everybody Loves Raymond – 312 – The creators of Everybody Loves Raymond would have you believe that everybody loves Raymond. Well guess what? I hate Raymond ha-ha! Hey j/k, I actually don’t but c’mon he was just askin’ for it…kind of like a chick who wears slutty clothes to a party and drinks too much. Anyway, this show is not very funny, and if I met the character Raymond from Everybody Loves Raymond he would probably talk like this: “Uhhh well I’m Raymond, I’m a sports writer or something uhhh.” Well you know what? Whatever.

Yes, Dear – 224 – This show is for the birds, because only a bird could be stupid enough to like this show. As you might have guessed by the title, the show loosely revolves around married guys who are pussy whipped by their nagging, bitchy bitch wives’ pussies. In this show there is a kind of goofy professional type guy, and he has a wife and his trashy brother lives with him. To get an idea of how trashy this brother character is, keep in mind that most of the time he is wearing a baseball cap! Is that even sanitary?

Two and a Half Men – 356 – I had actually really never seen this show until last night and while I was watching it they showed that Capitol One commercial with Spiderman in it, so that was pretty great! As far as I can tell, this show is about two men (one of whom is Charlie Sheen!) taking care of a fat kid. Maybe instead of letting the kid pig out on pizza and jellybeans, they should turn off his Nintendo and make him go outside and play soccer. It’s just an idea.


Mammy!
The Amazing Race – 678 – “Yes!” That’s what I would say if you asked me, “Do you like the Amazing Race?” I really do. I didn’t used to, but then my girlfriend made me watch it with her and what can I say…she got me hooked! Of course I don’t actually have a girlfriend, but if I did she would probably make me watch The Amazing Race and I would pretend I didn’t like it but I actually do (shhh, please don’t tell my fake girlfriend)!

Numb3rs – 420 - “Everything is numbers.” This is a line from the promo for Numb3rs, and hey, they’re right! If you really think about it, everything is numbers…for example:
5: number of fingers on my hand
40: ounces of booze water in a 40
3: looks like a mirrored letter “E”
So there ya go! When you are watching this show, make sure you are really smart or else you won’t be able to keep up with all the complex equations and algorithms and string theories and X-Boxes and whatnot. This show makes me wish my brother was a genius mathematician like the FBI guy’s brother on Numb3rs. Instead of being a genius mathematician, my brother works at Taco Time. I guess I’ll cut him some slack since he’s still in high school.


Numbers
Survivor: Palau – 615 – Pretty good. I don’t really have anything sassy to say about this season of Survivor, but how about Rudy from the original? “Rawr, I’m Rudy! I’m old! Please don’t put me in a home! Ohhh noowhoaaaohhh, I pooped my pants again! Please don’t put me in a home!”

The King of Queens – 391 - This show would be a lot better if it were about a really good transvestite. Or a rapper. Or anything except a fat guy UPS driver. And indeed, a fat guy UPS driver exactly what this pointless exercise in banality is about. Yeah, I said it. Here’s an actual quote from Kevin James, the star of the show: “Shit and crap in my mouth.” Well, I’d have to say you’re being a little redundant there, Mr. James, but okay! [unzips pants lol] This is just another stupid CBS show about weird jerk guys with sassy wives who are moderately more attractive than they should be. Whatever, I’m so through with The King of Queens.

CSI – 538 – Bah, CSI is ok. Actually it’s kind of stupid.

NCIS – 424 – CSI what? I guess CBS decided that it would be a smart business move to have another show with the name of their most popular program cleverly hidden within. NCIS stands for National Crime Investigations and Shit, and it’s got a character who’s some smarty sassy goth punk bitch. I’ll pass.

J.A.G. – 311 - F.A.G. This show is like Pensacola: Wings of Gold meets Ally McBeal…and I don’t mean that in a good way! Watching JAG is like getting a blowjob from Amber Frye while your penis slowly loses blood-flow, becoming flaccid as the all the energy in the room dissipates and begins its long journey to distant, lifeless galaxies.

The Late Show with David Letterman – 598 - If David Letterman was a blowjob, he’d be the kind where it’s given by a really tall and drunk Midwesterner named Batman. That is to say, David Letterman is cool guy, but if you jokingly ask him to use his utility belt on you, he looks at you weird and later you find his name was actually Luke Jackson.


grraaaaaaaaaaa
Live! With Regis and Kelly – 591 – Better than you’d expect, mostly because Kelly Ripa is kind of a crazy bitch. I remember watching her on All My Children a grip of time ago and it was hard to tell if she was a crazy bitch back then because I was so young and she was so tubular. Regis is a firecracker and Kelly is a disaster waiting to happen, so when you put them together you had better expect trouble (and lots of mildly amusing casual conversation)! Middle-aged women love this shit. Getting between a middle-aged woman and a television showing Live! is like standing between a mother bear and her cub, mostly because of the whole fat thing.

Still Standing – 193 – Whoa, another fat guy with a wife! Memo to CBS head-honchos in charge of new series development: in real life, fat guys don’t have wives…they have dogs…and when they go home at night they have sex with those dogs. Hot fucking sex.

Listen Up – 348 – Fat guy with a wife with a twist! What’s the twist? Get this: the fat guy is George from Seinfeld! Except instead of being pathetic and unlikable, now he’s obnoxious and unlikable. George walks around being a pretty big asshole to everybody and fucking everything up and then at the end of each episode he redeems himself by being slightly less of a fuckup. Occasionally Eddie from Family Matters steps in to advise George that he’s being too big of a fuckup asshole…and I don’t think I’d be spoiling too much to tell you that Eddie is still searching for the money to buy those high-tops.

Joan of Arcadia – 431 – The production value of this TV show is fairly high so it’s not a total mess, but it’s still pretty homo. In case you don’t know, this program chronicles the life of Joan, some angsty, stupid high school bitch who talks to God in the form of a stranger on the bus. I am, of course, referencing the theme song of this show which is none other than the “What If God Was One of Us” song by Joan Osborne. I guess it would be kind of funny if Joan Osborne were the same person as the title character, and the show was meant to chronicle the years leading up to the creation of her hit single, but I don’t think that’s what’s going on. Anyway, it’s Joan overload as we explore what it would be like to be a stupid high school bitch who talks to God a bunch. Anytime Joan is talking to God in the form of some random crazy jerk, she always clues in the viewers at home by saying something very similar to, “Well you’re God, why don’t you tell me.” Oh man, wouldn’t it be horribly awkward if she accidentally said that to somebody who wasn’t God? Like some black chick? The black chick would probably be like “Ohhhh, snap! Uhhh nuh-unh, honey! Please tell me yous did not just go thurr…..…gurrrrrrrrrl!!”

Oprah – 704 – Oh, Oprah! I would like to bend Oprah over my Ferrari and put my shit all up in her shit until she female ejaculates all over my Armani suit. Just kidding, but I make a good point: Oprah is hot. I’ve been liking her look a lot lately…she’s got this wacky curly hair that makes her seem kinda like a pudgy, black orphan Annie. This, of course, is highly ironic because Oprah got raped a bunch or something. And that’s not funny. Okay, maybe just a little bit.


Fuck me good, baby
The Price is Right – $1, Bob – Hey, I’m low-balling it but damn this show is hot. The producers of TPIR are super smart because they leave everything all cheesy and crazy and it’s great! If I were ever on the price is right, I would make a shirt that says “EUGENE, OREGON LOVES BOB BARKER” If I then somehow actually got on and won a new car or a charming and elegant living room set or something then I would jump up and down and then give Bob a really big hug and then start pressing my finger into his asshole through his pants really hard until I got kicked off the show.

Judging Amy – 289 – Well, as long as we’re at it…Amy is moderately attractive and kind of a bitch. Her mom is a fat slut who works for child protective services, but all she’s really protecting is her food so that she can stay fat.

Jeopardy – 822 – Jeopardy has it all: answers, questions, smarties, and Alex Trebek! A couple of years ago Alex shaved off his moustache, and now I can’t help but feel that his face just seems kinda…empty. I was trying to think of what would be a wacky replacement for his moustache, but the best I could come up with was the a stalk of wheat.


Yes. Was this a stupid idea?
Wheel…of…Fortune – 969 – Easily the best show on TV, Wheel is a colorful spectacle that’s almost as much fun to play from home as it is in real life! The show’s host Pat Sajak is witty, cool, handsome, and always at the top of his game. I have various sexual fantasies about having sex with Pat Sajak and/or his lovely assistant Vanna White. One of the wilder ones involves me fucking the shit out of Vanna on top of the big wheel while Pat Sajak hits me from the back. We’re in a nice rhythm; the wheel is spinning, all three of us are screaming our heads off, and the studio audience is loving it. All of a sudden, after a particularly powerful orgasm, Vanna throws her head back in ecstasy only to be instantly killed as one of the wheel’s pegs smashes into the base of her skull. A tense silence penetrates the room as her body goes limp and time seems to stand still as I sit frozen in mid-thrust. After a few moments of extreme awkwardness, I slowly, ever so slowly, begin to slide my dick back down into Vanna’s tunnel of love. Pat, following my lead, hesitantly gets back to work on my ass, pumping in and out at a gentle pace. The audience sits stunned as me and Pat gradually become more and more vigorous, grabbing Vanna’s body and throwing it around with unrestrained passion. A lone spectator boldly begins to clap, reluctantly at first, but then quickly gaining confidence and volume. A second audience member joins in, then another…then another. Before long the whole audience is performing a full-on standing ovation, cheering loudly and whistling as me, Pat, and Vanna’s corpse writhe around wildly. Within a few short minutes, we’re all covered in blood and gasping for breath (well, except for Vanna, of course). As Pat and I lay back on the wheel with Vanna’s awkwardly positioned corpse between us, we both reflect on the monumental feat in which we have both participated. I sigh with contentment as I feel the moment slip away into eternity, knowing I’ll never be back to this special place where it’s just me, Pat, Vanna’s corpse, and the wheel. And the studio audience. Pat leans over the side of the wheel, reaching into his pants to grab a pack of Camel Light cigarettes. He offers me one, and I gladly accept. As I light up, I get hella nico buzzed. I spend a couple minutes sucking down that sweet, sweet smoke as the audience members talk and laugh and crack open booze. As my cigarette nears completion, I sit up and being to look around for a convenient place to extinguish the butt. An audience member, noticing my dilemma, yells,
“Put it out on her clit!”
“What?!” I shout back, unable to hear well due to having my left ear clogged with Vanna’s blood.
“Put it out your cigarette on Vanna’s clit!” shouts the same audience member. This time it gets through loud and clear.
“You want me to put out my cigarette on her clit?” I ask, puzzled.
“YES!” shout a few audience members in unison.
“Are you sure?” I shout out, still somewhat buzzed from the nico buzz.
“Put it out on her clit!” the audience members scream over and over. Their passionate cries eventually build to a chant. “PUT IT OUT…ON HER CLIT…PUT IT OUT…ON HER CLIT!” I look over at Pat Sajak, who simply shrugs and says,
“Give the people what they want.”
“Okay, okay...I’m going to put it out on her clit!” I yell towards the audience members, who immediately erupt into hysterics once again. I motion for them to settle down, and they happily oblige, their cheers tapering off into excited murmurs. I gently lean over Vanna’s pubic region and position her legs so that the audience can get a clear view of her genitalia. I then use one hand to spread apart her labia, doing my best to expose her clitoris as clearly as possible.
“Do it!” shouts a woman in the audience impatiently as I hold the burning cigarette in my hand, its noxious vapors slowly increasing my risk of cancer. I once again motion for silence and the audience quickly complies, becoming almost totally quiet. I flash a devilish grin and begin to slowly move the cig’s burning ember towards Vanna White’s now-useless center of sexual pleasure. The tension is palpable as the red-hot tobacco draws closer and closer to its destination. Eventually I can hold back no longer and I smash the lit cigarette into her clit, breaking the tense silence with a sickening hiss. The audience erupts into a chorus of laughter and both me and Pat Sajak instantly climax. Our wads of cum fly forth from our cocks of fortune and somehow collide in midair over Vanna’s body, forming a massive glob of seminal fluid that promptly falls into the sexy Ms. White’s gaping maw and slides down her throat. It turns out that Pat Sajak is a suicide bomber and then he blows himself up, killing everybody. Yes, it’s a weird fantasy, but it’s my fantasy, and that’s what counts. Big money!

So that’s CBS! I hope that these ratings and commentaries have provided you with some insight as to why and how you should watch this network. The future for CBS looks bright, and I’m sure we all anxiously await the bold new programming choices which they are sure to bring us as we move into the information age yesss.

AZ GD CBS

Here's a little song I wrote...it's called "Don't Worry, Fuck You!"

Also here's another song I kind of wrote, you're supposed to sing it to the "Sugar, sugar, you are my candy girl" one okay?
Suge Knight, Suge Knight (buh buh buh buh buh buh) ohhhhh
Suge Knight, Suge Knight
Your name is Su-u-uge Knight
And you're the owner of death row records
Open the door, get on the floor
Everybody walk the dinosaur
Pretty great, huh?
Have you ever watched the David Letterman late night show? David Letterman is pretty funny, but I've noticed that watching this programme is the most mind numbing experience imaginable. It's not really boring or anything, it just fucks you up. Here's my impression of rapper Redman after watching The David Letterman late night show.
Redman: "Whoooa that was a great episode of the David Letterman show but now I'm in a weird mood, so turn off the TV okay?"
Prince Paul: "Okay where's the remote!"
Redman: "I don't know, nigga! Bounce, bounce!"
Prince Paul: "Oh man I am so hi oh wait here's the remote okay there we go...click."
Redman: "Okay anyways back to work on the new album...it's coming along pretty good, but I can't help but feel that it still needs something..."
Prince Paul: "Um...more music?"
Redman: "Hmmm....no, no. That doesn't really make any sense. Actually I'm thinkning more along the lines of...more skits! Yeah, that's the ticket."
Prince Paul: "As the producer of your new album I think you are right on you don't have enough skits let's add like 5 more."
Redman: "Okay."
Hahahahhahahahahhh so there you go! Okay while I making up fake conversations here's one between Britney Spears and her hubby wubby dubby.
Brit's hubby: "Hey baby check out these cool shoes I bot!"
Britney Spears: "Ooh those are cute ya!"
Brit's hubby: "I know, aren't they?"
Britney Spears: "Ya! They totally remind me of these shoes my old boyfriend used to wear all the time!
Brit's hubby: "What?!?!?!!"
The end?

Get low

Hey look folks I don't know much about anything but I can tell you that this a picture of the late Pope John Paul II giving somebody a footrub. Is this really appropriate? Can't we get somebody less important to do this? These burning questions burn in my mind like a hot coal burning the clothes of a small child who got a little too close to the barbeque and the barbeque tipped over on them WHOOSH!
Do you play NBA street? It's really fun so I hope so but aaanyways you know the gamebreaker? Well, I guess if you've never played NBA Street, then right now you are probably like "W-T-F? What?" hey so chill out, I can explain everything (literally). As you may have guessed, NBA Street is a basketball game, and in this basketball game you can do tricks and slam dunks and shit. As you string together crazy combinations of dunks and jukes and alley-oops you fill up a "power meter". When this meter is full, some really awesome music starts playing and if you hit a secret combination of buttons (I'll give you a hint you have to hold L1 maybe) then you can perform some awesome shots and drunks and shit that are super accurate and also knock points off you opponents score! You can see how this would be useful. Now, me being me, I got to thinking...and this is what I thought: "Hey wouldn't it be funny if you could get a gamebreaker in real life...during sex?" Yeah, that's what I was thinking! Like imagine if you were getting a blowjob and all of a sudden the gamebreaker music kicks in!! The chick (or dude if you're a fag) giving you the blowjob would probably roll her eyes like "Oh man, here we go again." And then you blow your load, it'd be great! I guess if you don't know what the gamebreaker music sounds like then you wouldn't get it, but trust me it's really funny.

This man is probably not playing NBA Street
Well speaking of sex and blowjobs, I'd like to spit out a few thoughts on one of my favorite things in the whole world: women! Here's the one thing that you need to know about women: on a long enough timeline, every woman will always cheat on you a shitload. Now, don't get me wrong, to my knowledge I've never been cheated on, but I still know this is true. Why? Because all women are sluts. Haha I'm sure you've heard that before and it's kind of silly but closer to the truth than you might think. "But why," you ask yourself, "Why do women have to be sluts?" Well, it's a little tricky to explain but here goes. A lot of women get off on being "bad". This can include non-sexual things like lying a bunch for no reason (ladies love lying) or smoking cigs, but mostly it takes the form of fucking the shit out of some guy while they already have a boyfriend. Perhaps they feel pangs of guilt, but it doesn't matter because that's all part of the fun for women! See, guys cheat because they are assholes, women cheat just so that they can be sluts. The greatest pleasure in life for many women is trying to pack in loving moments with their boyfriends as close as possible to moments of cheating fucking sluttiness. I mean, because what could be better than calling up your boyfriend to tell him that you love him right before you give a blowjob to that hunky dude you met at the club? Seriously, this is essentially how a large number of women think. Now, beyond just the "being a bad girl" motivation, what drives women to be cheating sluts? Well, a lot of people would just kind of glaze over this, but I'll say it: all women have been sexually abused. Yep, all of them. Of course this brings into play issues of sexual compulsion, assertions of control, self-destrictive tendencies, and that general craziness that only every woman ever alive could possibly understand. Yes, I'm sure a lot of cheating whores don't even know why they have to be such horrible sluts, but the point is they do have to. Okay but ladies, here's my message to you: don't fucking cheat on me. It's not a huge-ass deal if you do, but after that point we must never have sex again. While this of course robs you of the pleasure of hurting me emotionally and possibly physically, I'm willing to live with that. I don't care how much I love a woman, or how drunk she was when she sucked off that hobo, the moment I find out about any of that shit going down then you are out of my life, that's all there is to it. Now, I'm a pretty trusting guy, and I'll let a gal do what she wants and hang out with who she wants. But here's what worries me: women love to fuck around on trusting guys the most. They've been hurt before, and they're damn well going to turn that around and subconsciously inflict emotional trauma on every guy who loves them. I mean, because who could possibly be a better target for your subtly sadistic romantic dealings than some chump who'd never even look at another woman? Jesus Christ, even if a woman is totally in love with you, that still doesn't mean she's not gonna cheat. After all, what could be sluttier than fucking around while you're in a totally fulfilling and mutually loving relationship?? Nothing! In summary, go take a shower and while you're at it wash the dead skin cells from all those guys' cocks out of your vag.

Kendraaaaa

This one is called "Gangster Accusations"...go suck a nut!

So cool