Hey

With all of the hub-ub and buzz about this show "Fear Factor" I've been trying to figure out why America likes to see sexy women being forced to eat fried dolphin cocks and have their faces covered in bugs. After a bunch of thinking about this, I decided I just don't get it buuuuut...I have a cool idea for a new show and it's kind of like "Fear Factor" but with a major twist! First of all, dudes: don't worry there's still plenty of sexy women! Yessssss. Well by this point you are probably asking yourself, "I don't get it, what makes this show special?" Chill out, here's the scoop: instead of playing up the already worn-out gag of having sexy women eat cat balls and praying mantises, my show will have them shitting out cats balls and praying mantises. The logistics of turning this act into a competitive event are actually quite simple; it all starts with a sexy woman having her teammate grab handfulls of gross shit out of a plexiglass box that we'll call "Station A" and cramming them into her sexy butthole. It really doesn't matter whether her teammate is a girl or a guy, it just matters that whatever they're shoving up there should be alive or previously alive. Possible packables might include earthworms, hissing cockroaches, or owl pellets. Once the sexy woman has had her ass smashed full of unmentionably revolting objects, she has to quickly saunter over to a nearby scale sitting on top of a wooden crate, a set-up that we'll label "Station B". She must then summon all of her strength to eject the contents of her butt onto the scale with the goal of depositing a predertimined mass of whatever substances have been sexily placed inside of her. After she has eliminated her bounty, she must hop back over to Station A and "re-up" her butt with more gushy objects, running back and forth until she has finally shit out two pounds of sea urchins or whatever. Maybe in between the stations she should also have to swim through a pool of piss while holding her breath. All of this takes place in a warehouse on a dock. Or a dick.