True Life: I'm a Jerk (also known as a busta)

Ooooh, who's a good kitty!??! You are!! Yes, you are!! oooh do you want some food!?! Well first you're gonna have to walk around on two legs just like a little baaaaby! Oh no you don't like that but it's just cause you are a cat but what are you going to do!?!? Oooh I'm going to put a little cat dress on you then you will be a little gay person cat yay!!!!!!
Well hey just kidding folks whats up fags? Man have you any of you been watching MTV lately? There's some funky shit on that channel. Do you ever watch TV and somebody says shit and you are just like "I don't get it." Well I do that but it's mostly because I am really really good at breaking people apart especially when they are on TV and if I am not supposed to get it well that's what I say. Ya that's basically waht I did when I was watching crazy asshole actress on the D.L hughley late night show the other night. That semi-ugly gal from that not really popular TV show "Less Than Perfect" was on that show and like she was flirting with D.L. Hughley if you could call it that....I dunno I guess you just had to see it but yah, some people, when you put them in front of a camera they just start performing. Can't do nothin about it.
Man no really it must suck not to have a 7-inch cock...cause like if you don't, you're damned, but if your cock is like 10 inches dude what chick are you gonna put that in? Shaq's wife seems like a good cantidate. That gal must have an abnormally huge vagina...if you've ever seen her on Shaq cribs that's exactly what you were thinking. Man guys I have to go.....well anyways yah blah blah blah blah lata jerks