Yeah, that's what I'm talkin' about

What's up guys?! Well tonight I was browsing through these writings and I noticed that somebody had left a comment on my entry entitled "An Impression of RENT." When I saw this I was all super pumped up and I was shaking and bouncing all over the place! I excitedly clicked the link to the comments page, expecting to find that somebody had said something like "lol! That was grate man, you've still got it" but no! Instead, somebody had written this:
you are an idiot
My huge smile twisted into a tear, which came out of my eye. I read the comment again, and there was no mistaking the fact somebody had indeed posted a mean-spirited, hateful super slam on my intelligence. My shock and sadness quickly turned into rage as I grabbed a nearby paperback book and threw it at a wall as hard as I could.
Once I regained my composure, I fell into a state of total puzzlement...why would somebody leave this comment which was obviously intended to hurt my heart? As I reread my RENT entry, I realized what was wrong...some faggot was upset about my portrayal of the musical. As I said, I have never seen RENT, but I guess I just assumed it was a couple of hours of gay people sucking each other off and singing songs about it. Well, I couldn't have been more wrong. After reading about the play on the official RENT website, my world has been turned upside down! It turns out there are no homosexuals in RENT! In fact there are no sexual themes to be found. And definetly no David Robinson. Hey I am just kidding! According to the official RENT synopsis, there's plenty of all these things...and more! Check it out:
...As Joanne wrangles with the sound equipment for Maureen's performance, her parents leave her VOICE MAIL #2, pleading with her to come to her mother's confirmation hearings in Washington. Collins arrives at the loft with a bag full of goodies. This includes Angel, transvested into Angel Dumott Shunard and gloriously arrayed in his Christmas finest- wig, glitter, and platform pumps. In TODAY 4 U, Angel explains how he earned $1,000: a wealthy woman hired him to play the drums until her neighbor's yappy Akita barked itself to death.
Whoa, that's craaaazy! Armed with my new awarness of the complexeties of this musical, I present my second impression of RENT:
David Robsinson: What's up Joanne?
Joanne: Oh, nada mucho, just wranglin with the sound equipment for Maureen's performance! Yo, check out this message my parents left me:
Hey, put on a fancy and dress and earings
Come check out my confirmation hearings
Comin up atcha right outta the blue
Really hope you like it, it's voicemail #2
David Robinson: Wow, that's awesome!
Angel: Hey guys, I'm back!
David Robinson: Hey, what's up, sexy?
Angel: Oh nothing much........I just made a thousand bucks.
Joanne: What? How?!
Angel: Sucking dick. No I am just kidding! Actually, a wealthy woman hired me to play drums until her neighbor's yappy Akita barked itself to death.
David Robinson: Haha, that's awesome!
Joanne: You go girl!
Angel: Oh I will! I will go straight to the bank...to desposit all this money I just made!
The Evil Landlord: Not so fast! You owe me exactly $1000, so now it's time to pay the RENT.
Angel: Maaaaan.
David Robinson: Now hold on just a minute here. There's gotta be a way to resolve this so that everybody gets what they....want.
The Evil Landlord: Ha! I seriously doubt that.
David Robinson: How about...you let Angel keep his money...
The Evil Landlord: Never!
David Robinson: ..and we all suck each others dicks.
The Evil Landlord: .....Well...that would be...acceptable.
Later that night:
The Evil Landlord: Oh yeah, oh...oh yeah, that's the stuff. Suck my dick you dirty fucking faggot. Oh...oh god...I'm gonna come. Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooal!
David Robinson: Mmmmmmmm what?
The Evil Landlord: Oh my, that was faaaabulous!
Angel: This is so hot. Okay now I'll suck David Robinson's dick while you fuck him in his filthy faggot shitty nasty asshole, Evil Landlord.
David Robinson: Oh, oh yeah, that's the stuff. Suck me off, homo. Make me blow my gay load of hot and spicy cum all over the place, faggot.
The Evil Landlord: Okay now I'm gonna stick my hard cock in your wacky black anus.
David Robsinson: Is it in yet?
The Evil Landlord: Yes, yes it is.
David Robinson: Yeah, that's what I'm talkin about. Oh...oh god...here it comes...here it comes.......cha-plow!
Spiderman: Oh great, you got some of your fag jism on my outfit, queerhead.
Angel: Whatever you do, don't rub that stuff in any open wounds! (everybody cracks up)
The End!