Icy cool breeeeeath

Hey what's up fags?
Tonight I woke up reallllly late, as the sun was going down, and there was a bunch of boxes in the fridge! True story.
But no, it's get crazier cause in the boxes were food! You see, every weekend my mom's boyfriend comes down and they get drunk and order a bunch of food through Pony Express. In our fridge, I found a box of macaroni and cheese and 3 other boxes with salads in them. 2 of the salads were completely untouched. I tried to eat the macaroni and cheese but it was all hard and nasty. I then moved onto one of the salads and I opened up the little cup of dressing and put it on the salad and started to eat it. But the salad tasted kinda like fish and it was very gross.
Much later on in the night, around 4 a.m., I made nachos in my microwave. I took some round totrtilla chips and layed them out on a plate. I have some sliced swiss cheese so I ripped up a slice and put a little bit on each chip. I proceeded to take some shredded sharp cheddar cheese and sprinkle that on the chips. I tried not to just slob it all over them, but much like I did with the swiss focused on getting a little on each chip. I took the plate with the chips and the cheese and put it in my microwave for 20 seconds. Some of the cheese was still not melted, so I "nuked" it for another 5. Then I took the plate out of the microwave, and I realized that I had officialy created nachos! So then I ate the nachos! They were very tasty.
I was still a little hungry so I took out one of the other salads and this one was totally different. It had lettuce, spinach, walnuts, blue cheese, and strawberries in it! The blue cheese came in tasty little chunks which had unusually large amounts of mold in them. Instead of crazy fish dressing, this salad came with ranch. I gooped some ranch onto the salad and ate it up. It was...not bad, not bad at all.
I guess it's kind of silly how my mom and her boyfriend get drunk and order food every weekend. What kind of sucks is they never even get close to sloppy drunk, which would lead to all sorts of zany antics! Instead they seem to feel the need to do normal stuff, like put dishes in the dishwasher.
A gal once told me a story about how Kaylynn Pabst and Lindz Fisher once made out in front of a bunch of other girls. She ended the story with "I mean, I could understand if there had been guys there, but don't you think that's just kind of weird?" I am now thinkin the gal who told me this is probably bisexual, cause why not.
I would like to show you, my friends, my new favorite website. I present to you, Pozie. I'm lovin' it!
Though the layout is far from perfect, it's the content that really sets this place apart. You can't put this site into any one category, but it does seem to have a salient message: marijuana is exciting!
The design is vibrant and colorful, with a lot of movement that grabs your attention and won't let go and just shakes it and shakes it and shakes it.

9+555555555555555555555555558+r
Sorry, a large spider just ran across my keyboard and I had to take it outside and get the beast off. Through the miracles of wireless technology, you can now picture my fingers grasping the keyboard as I shake it and blow the spider off.
Anyways, back to the internet. Just like fuck you magic I can easily leech images from "Pozie" and present them to you right here, right now, right in my blogspot.
Yo, check this out:

Hahahahahah! If you don't already know, the goofy fellow who you see here is "Mario", of Nintendo fame. What's that in his mouth? It's a joint! Lol! The irony here, of course, is that Mario is a fictional character in a children's video game and can't actually smoke weed, nor would his overseers ever want him associated with the usage of illicit drugs! Man, that's rich! Moving on...

What we have here is a presumably a real poster/flyer/bulletin edited for maximum laughage! Your typical doper would surely be drawn to the prominent display of a pot leaf, subtitled with the word "drugs" in bright red letters. These poor fools would most likely proceed to edge closer to the visual spectacle, cautiously hopefull that they were on track to recieve some of these drugs. Upon closer inspection, their crazy brains would most likely notice the block of text located towards the bottom. With some effort they would probably be able to read through the information presented and piece together that this is not in fact an advertisement for drugs, but a warning to those who might possess or use them.
The creators of "Pozie", however, have turned this concept on its head, turning an imposing message to drugheads into a delightful endorsement of the trafficking or consumption of illegal substances! Perhaps my sense of humor is just a little bit immature, but this is the funniest thing I've ever seen. Moving on...

What we have here is just plain silly! At first glance, this seems like a normal picture of Lady Liberty with the words "Legalise It" written across the top. This might leave you wondering, "Legalise what? Is there something here which has not been legalised?" at which point you might happen to notice that the this is no ordinairy Statue of Liberty! No, this is more like the Statue of Smoke! Smoke weed, that is! Yes, if you look carefully you'll notice that in the statue's hand is a big fat dooberino! In addition, her patented "spikey-hat" has been transformed into a weed hat with weed on it! And hey, if you think about it, weed is green...and so is the oxodized copper which composes the statue of liberty! How perfect!
But the creativity of this picture is not limited to a simple visual gag! Indeed, the message here is sublte and multi-layered. There is a much more serious concept at work here which weighs especially heavy on our minds due to recent events. The very meaning of "liberty" has been and debated and rediscovered as of late...this picture gets right to the heart of that issue as we realise that the Statue of Liberty wouldn't actually smoke weed...because it's a statue! But beyond that, because marijuana is illegal! This begs the question, are we living in a country in which we are truly free to smoke weed? Or or this merely an ideal which which has lost its meaning in our all-too-opressive society? And why is the British spelling of "legalize" used in conjunction with a picture of a uniquely American icon? And since the Statue of Liberty was a gift from the French, should we hate it? The irony here is so thick that you could karate chop it. Moving on...

"E.T. smoke bowl!" That's what E.T. the extraterrestrial would have said in his movie...if it were about weed! Yes, it's true: aliens do exist and they're here for our superdank! These beings have travelled countless lightyears from a distant galaxy to stimulate their cannabinoid receptors with our "silly smoke"! Okay, okay, so nobody's really sure if there's life...out there...but you have to love the goofy idea of aliens hopping in their spaceship and scooting off to earth simply to get high!
The beautiful psychadelic artwork of this image would make a really cool poster to hang on the wall in a room where you smoke weed. Somebody smoking weed in said room who happened to look at this picture would probably become entranced by the astoundingly intricate patterning of the alien's skin. As soon as they read the tagline, however, they would be sure to snap out of their daze as they begin to laugh uncontrollably at the hilarious mental image of an alien smoking marijuana! Then they would probably see the alien picture wink at them, because that's what happens when you get high; pictures wink at you. Moving on...

...everyday! No explanation needed. Moving on...

Once again, our world is world is turned upside down as we see inanimate objects smoking weed! Hey, they can't do that! These moai statues on Easter Island were created over hundreds of years by the Rapa Nui, a culture which disappeared long ago and was totally isolated from cannabis! But that's all part of the fun as we laugh our asses off at these silly monoliths! The creator of this image knew that a joke can't float by on a wacky visual alone, so they have added the caption "stoned again" written out in smoke coming from the lit marijuana cigarettes held in the mouths of the moai! Too good! In case you don't get it, the statues are made of volcanic "rock", also known as "stone". The word "stoned" is very similar to "stone" and therefore, in this context, is extremely funny. Hell, for all I know the two terms may be etymologically related! Wouldn't that be trippy? Yes! Aaaaand last but not least...

While the true wackiness of this picture is not immediately apparent, if you pay atttention, you can tell this dude is totally high off his ass. I mean, he's totally getting paint all over the place. I'm surprised he was even able to spell out his painted message correctly! Perhaps the red paint/text is symbolic of the his red eyes, which we would see if the picture were a little bigger. If you don't believe my asserions about his mental state...I mean, just look at this guy...you can totally tell.
Well, well, well. That's about it for now! I hope you all have hours of fun browsing through the voluminous amount of content on "Pozie", and don't forget to vote.